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Reflection, Projection, Lesson - Choose your Weapon!

Updated: Mar 18, 2021

It took me a long while to access the power to understand the art of RPL and to realise things which challenge us in this human experience are most likely to fall into one of the above. The ability to surrender to these happenings becomes a much easier transition to inner wisdom and peace if we can master the gifts they bring us.

However, these gifts are only perceptible if you choose to see the blessing in the curse. Because if we CHOOSE to face our demons, rather than ignore them they eventually turn to nothing more than shapes in the smoke; disappearing as quickly as they appear. No longer demons but simply moments of awareness. This involves being honest with yourself and that takes strength which in turn cracks the lie into truth. If we see obstacles, people, situations which irritate/anger/annoy us from a place of detachment removing the personal feelings and the ego to see it objectively, it can be the catalyst to deep internal change and personal freedom.

I thank every trigger or raw unhealed emotion which surfaces for me now because this is where I grow, this is where I evolve, this is where I learn how to get to my highest potential. Facing it with a clear undiluted message to myself which honours just how far I’ve come.

We all have these darker energies on the flip coin of our light, you cannot have one without the other and over time if we do not step into the shadows, do the work and clear out the muck in our mental and emotional blocked drains then our light will become more strained and fractured. Real happiness will elude us, patterns repeat all to the same sorrowful tune and extended remix of ‘Why Me’ feat. ‘It’s not fair’. Resistance is futile. Not only will you the holder of these low energies suffering, others around you will also suffer. In fact that’s the B side: ‘Suffering’ feat. Denial.

No amount of turning the record over helps. No matter how much you bleat about it to others, apologise over and over again for repeated bad choices or behaviours. You are merely entrenching more pain and discord towards yourself and those around you. So, be brave, go forward and seek personal freedom and change the record! Let yourself dance to a new beat.

R P L briefly explained - are now my favourite little healing hacks to compliment your expansion process on a daily basis.

Reflection gives you the chance to unravel the stories you’ve been told to believe. Imagine looking into a mirror seeing a person you don’t recognise. But being told that’s you. How would you feel? Angry, annoyed, upset? This is your trigger moment. Triggers are the guides. Recognising them allows us to change the script. Sit with it and feel it. It’s the parts of your unhealed self being reflected back at you, it’s your chance to see the good, the bad and the ugly within.

Seeing something in someone else which you may not want to see in yourself isn’t easy to admit, but healing isn’t easy otherwise everyone would be doing it and we’d live in an idyllic blissful utopian existence, but until the rest of the world catches up just concentrate on yourself and stay open. Be aware of what a Reflection is trying to teach you. Choose to see yourself in truth and own your sh*t, it’s just a way of taking responsibility for yourself. Recognising reflections helps us become kinder, softer and more compassionate human beings. For I am you and you are me, what I see in you I must see in myself because there is no separation, we are all one. Everything is connected.

So, for example if someone in your life is unkind and this disrupts you internally you are being shown there is unkindness in yourself, somewhere.

There is no need to pull yourself over hot coals or throw yourself on the floor sobbing that you are a terrible human being. Stay detached and just look at areas within yourself where this might be reflecting, learn, where is there unkindness? Is it in your words, habits, self-talk or your actions to others, your commitment to loving yourself? It's personal to each of us. Find where the dominoes begin to topple and from that point begin to work back, go deeper, write it down, examine the feeling, feel the feeling and allow it to be there, but keep questioning, where does this come from? Unravel it, this is just another key to growth you never knew you had until now. It’s there to help you, not undermine you. It’s there to be of use so use it to your benefit. This is about empowerment of the self and yes it might be painful/confusing/frustrating but just stay with it and allow yourself to watch how many of the same patterns cross your path creating the same reactions within you. Once you bring that process into your awareness you can investigate your deeper-self, finding new answers and new ways of being. Habits can be formed by emotion, so do the math. If you change your emotional responses life will begin to take a different turn, insights and epiphanies and all sorts of wonder can come from this sort of self-inquiry. That’s the gift.

Projection when acknowledged is a way to master the internal reactor, teaching us ways of responding with emotional intelligence rather than dramatically overreacting or lashing out. We can react negatively in situations time and time again and wonder why we find ourselves in a painful cycle, bemused, indignant, blaming others. Unaware we are in essence causing our own suffering.

When something inside of you is unhealed, ignored, unloved or repressed it could eventually manifest its way into your reality via projection, because it’s too painful for you to deal with so it's repressed/suppressed only to project that pain onto something or someone else; like a temporary release valve. It's an easy get out clause of the human condition. ‘Blame someone else, it’s not my problem’. Projection shows you where maybe. Just maybe it IS your problem.

We will push and push and push against people projecting our pain and focus outward onto others and not ever question it and the pattern will be there and repeats like a scratched record until they leave us, give up, break down etc and when they do, we sit in this twisted glory of satisfaction as if it’s their fault. Own your actions. No one is responsible for how you feel as an adult EVER. Recognising a projection takeover is an act of self-care and self-love, acknowledge you are reacting instead of responding, catch the drama and overwhelming emotional states/urges and OWN yourself. See where you are projecting unhelpful/unhealthy emotions, it’s your teacher not your enemy. Recognise it, step back, take some time out, recluse, examine, journal, whatever works for you and be proud of yourself that you recognised it. Be really fucking proud of yourself! These are the steps to self-awareness, peeling back the damaged layers of the past and making the unconscious, conscious = one beautiful gift. Once it's conscious it begins to lose its power over you, allowing you to get to know and love yourself that little bit deeper.

Lessons quite simply are everywhere, absolutely everywhere. You just have to be open to receiving them. Allow yourself permission to learn from things rather than being hurt/resentful/bitter/upset etc. If you do feel any negative emotions go back to the event and try a Reflection or Projection exercise… because that’s where the lesson sits. The Lesson is the learning, the learning is in the teaching and by personal education you grow and evolve. Teach yourself to know yourself by recognising if you are reflecting or projecting in certain areas, begin to watch for the pattern and when you are aware of the pattern there is the lesson. The gift. The old stories fall away as you reclaim your power to be exactly who you are meant to be. It just takes practice, commitment and discipline. I'm not saying it's going to be easy but on the other side of it all is an abundance of bliss, inner peace and joy, it's there deep within you just waiting for you! But you need to clear the way for it all to emerge. You just need do the work, open yourself up and trust all that comes is for your highest good. It will all be worth it, I promise.

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